4 Days

Well, its been 4 days. Four days ago, we sent in our crazy long and time consuming, official application to Buckner. Once we had everything completed, I put off sending it in for about a week or so. It was a weird feeling. I know that God is in control, and He always has been, but when I had all those papers to fill out, doctor's appointments to fulfill, and information to gather, I felt like I was somehow in control. Now that control is gone. It's kind of scary and freeing all at the same time. I know we still have a little ways to go before the real waiting begins, but spiritually and emotionally, I feel like this step was a big one for me.

I didn't think it would take us this long to fill out an application. On April 11, we went to out first meeting with Buckner. It was incredible for me. I did not feel at peace at all until this meeting. We had been looking at several different agencies, and none of them felt right. I had several other pelimenary applications filled out and ready to send off, but I never felt like it was right to send them. Then we went to Buckner, and the Lord made it apparent that this was where we were supposed to be. It was exciting, and yet calming. I'm pretty sure I cried through part of the meeting. I was so happy that this was right, that I could not contain my emotion.

Now here we are, 2 months later with our official application done. It feels good. It is amazing to think that somewhere out there our baby may already be growing inside of their birthmom. Maybe not yet, but maybe so.

Julie

Father God,

Be with our baby. Watch over him and keep him. Work in a mighty way in the birthparents. Please place people in their paths that will lead them to You. Give them comfort and peace as they make the hardest decision that anyone could make. Most importantly, let Your glory be made known in our lives and in thiers. Amen